Sunday, July 16, 2006

-another weekend gone-

I don't get it. I really don't. I mean, it was just Monday! It was just there, looming out at me like I was some kind of intruder, and then suddenly I am looking at another Monday entirely (albeit still leering and looming), and in two months time I'm turning 14. What's up with that?

My impression of 14 was always these tall group of girls with long flippy hair, really really confident, greek-goddess beautiful (Note the high cheek bones, not the ancient part), and were really cool, with their dress sense and their sensibility and all. You had to respect them. They were 14. They were going to be sixteen in two years. There's like this invisible line between 13 and 14... and between 12 and 13. 13 is the middle line.

When I was 12 I really looked forward to being 13, and when nearing my birthday, I would tell people I was 'turning 13', and not '12'. 12 seemed to go by so painfully slowly (yeah, maybe it was because I looked forward to 13), and suddenly 13 is zipping by me so fast I hardly have time to register it.

Will I feel different when I'm 14? What would it be like? Would I be as confident in my steps, as cool, as beautiful, as spunky? I don't think so. For one thing, I suddenly feel really, really young, and everything is looming up above me, and everyone's talking down to me, because I'm 6, and I can't handle anything. I'm 6, and I look up at those 14-year-olds and think, "Woah, they're 14!"




13 is the middle line, and I'm crossing over.

Crossing over, and I don't know what to do with my life still.


| so spoken! @ 7:59 PM|

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